SOMETHING SOOOO WRONG

OK soooooo 2day did NOT start out so great...I got pink eye today :-) YEAH!!!!! SO EXCITED!!!!!
Life is going ok....i am really just BLAH about everything.....I am so scared of what life is going to bring. I always thought God was going to give me the desires of my heart...i mean i don't want wicked things...LOL
i want to be a church or christian school secretary, marry a TALL godly man, work with youth and have 20 kids(j/k only like 3 or 5).....I mean is there SOMETHING sooooooo wrong about that???? BLAH BLAH BLAH

BLAH

Life is not cool right now...I feel like i am in a downward spiral of POO....I can't find a job, I can't go to school...I am sick and tired of being everyones everything. I stay up late listening to my single friends WHINE about there love lives and how they don't know what to do about this problem or that problem. I am sick and tired of listening to my married friends whine about how they don't have time to do this or that or they wish they could just stay home with there kids and there husband or how they don't have money. I AM SICK OF IT ALL!!!!!
I would give anything to be able to take care of a man. Do his dishes, laundry, clean the house he has provided for me. I mean is that such a big friggin deal?? I mean i see these girls who are 18 and 19 getting married and having kids and then all they do is whine about how they want there childhood back....WELL THEN YOU SHOULD NOT HAVE GOTTEN MARRIED!!! DUH!!!!
I mean i don't get it. I want Gods will, I want what god wants in my life...BUT is this what he wants.....for me to have no job, no education,no life, no nothin???? I don't understand!!!!
I have ALWAYS been the "good girl" and my brothers and sister are technically doing better than me now everything is not perfect but they all have jobs, families, homes.....Why does ME the "good girl" suffer...CUZ I AM THE "GOOD GIRL"?????
I GIVE UP....whatever......

before at..whati weigh now after i lose 50lbs :-)

Going Crazy

OK sooo apparently i am NEVER going to be able to go to school. I can't get a grant because i am not on unemployment and i have not been laid off. I don't know what to do. It seems the closer i get to the thing i THINK God wants me to do..it gets shoved far far away.
I get sooo upset BUT then i try to think HEY maybe God has something so AWESOME for me that i can't handle it right now and when i am ready he will give it to me and then i will appreciate it more :-)
It is hard to think that. I feel like a giant failure. I want to go to school, i want to work and NOTHIN i am not doing either. I have applied for like 100 jobs in the last month NOTHIN from noone....I don't know what to do. I am just praying the Lord shows me SOMETHING soon!!!!

Wonderful Family

THE FOOD

my wonderful sister in law KimberlyMY niece Britt after i straightened her hair :-)

Thanksgiving was great this year. My brother and sister in law came over wednesday afternoon and spent the night and stayed til Thanksgiving night. It was AWESOME!! It is a tradition i want to keep :-)

We had services on Tuesday instead of wednesday and my whole family being Me,Marty, Nick,mom and Kimberly sang Create in me a clean heart at the service...It was AWESOME.

God has been sooo good to our family. If all of you knew what we have been through you would feel the same way i am sure. God's Grace truely is Amazing!!!!

NEW PICS oh and my new hair color ...LOL

This one is my favorite of my nephew Marty Jr :-)

41LBS THINNER :-)

41 down 9 to go....

I have now lost 41lbs...I am sooooo excited 9lbs to go.....Only 5 days til thanksgiving...LOL i am going to have to eat salad all week...LOL

FRUSTRATED

OK soooo going to BJ is out because i don't have the money like i thought i would....SOOOOOO
i am frustrated i don't know what to do. I can't find a job. I have applied EVERYWHERE and nothin....not even holiday help. Apparently God is trying to teach me SOMETHING because this keeps happening.....I get a job and keep it for awhile and something happens and then its like 6 months b4 i can get another one......I DON'T GET IT....i am trying to pay attention to what God is trying to teach me. I don't know.

I am trying to figure out what to do for school. I had a long talk with my sis in law and friend Beth and i think maybe i may go talk to a counselor at ab-tech and see if they have something for a high school history teacher and/ or maybe computers. I love history and i love teens sooo i think it should work. I am scared about having a hard time with the school work...BUT i have enough ppl around me that can help me. SO i think i should be ok!!! So i will let you know.

I just want to be happy and if i am honest with myself i am not happy not even a little bit....

Please Pray

I found out yesterday one of my good friends at the daycare i used to work at has breast cancer. She has 2 small boys that are almost 2 and one is 3. She is having a masectomy December 9th. Her name is Jolene....I am sure she would appreciate your prayers!!!
THANK YOU

My diet plan!!!

Ok so everyone has been asking me how i am losing weight so i thought i would take some time and tell ya :-)

I am counting calroies and exercizing :-)



I am doing it biggest loser style. I count calories.You take what you weigh times 7 and that is how many calories you should eat a day to lose weight. When i started i actually had a hard time eating 2000 calories. I eat ALOT of 100 calories packs and and it is not that they are low fat they are just portion controlled and i eat the cheetos and cheddar chex mix the most..LOL
For exercise i do the biggest loser videos 3x a week and 3x a week i walk for 45 min....The videos are cardio max and power sculpt. (pictured below)
Which is perfect because it helps tone your muscles so i am not so icky flabby as i lose weight :-)I like doing it and the more ppl are finding out the more support i am getting. Which is GREAT everyone needs support!!!!My biggest thing is i make it a game..ya know like how little calories can i eat this meal?? or how little cheese spread can i get on the cracker...OH and a little secret Laughing Cow cheese(also pictured below) the light is only 35 calories and it is soooo good i put it on bread,bagels and crackers and that is my cheese. I find it in my deli section and it is about 4.50 BUT its got 8 wedges in it and 1 wedge is 35 calories so if you don't want to use it all you can wrap it up and put it away BUT it is really good on WASA bread (pictured below) i found mine in the cracker isle..i have only had the multi grain and i eat it for lunch...i take a wedge of of the laughing cow and spread it between 2 crackers and put 2 slices of lunch meat...i eat chicken breast...i don't really like turkey...and that is my lunch that and a piece of fruit and water...AND it fills me up and its good.

38 down!!! 12 to go!!!

WEIGHT LOSS

I am sooo excited about my weight loss again this week!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
I have lost 2 lbs since thursday!!!
That means i am down 38 lbs and only 12 more to go til my first goal!!! I am lovin it..I feel so good!!!

SCHOOL

Well this is my newest thing..LOL
I would like to go to Bob Jones or Maybe even Ab Tech here in town and see if i can get a 2 yr buisness degree and a minor in baking and pastries. I am thinking of opening a coffee shop!!! My friend and I were brain storming!!! I am soooo excited i can't stand it!!!!
It will be called Flutterby!!! We were thinking of 2 different themes and one is a country modern theme and the other is a paris theme!!!! I will have baking classes in the back for teens and kids. I will play christian piano music and sell music from liek The Wilds, Crown, BJ and HAC. and maybe even folk stuff like Il Divo and Irish Tenors!! Things like that. I will also have coffee and juices of course :-) It would be a very kid friendly place BUT cozy enough for adults.

What ya think??? Let me know :-)

Hello my friends....
Life has been OK...nothing a big deal going on...I may be getting a job as a nanny for a 5 month old little boy...he is adorable....i am meeting the little boy and his dad tomorrow sometime...IF she calls......So we shall see.

I am also doing GREAT with my weight loss...I lost 10 lbs this week and so i am now down 36 lbs...14 more to go til i reach my first goal :-) which is to lose 50 by christmas!!!! I AM SOOOOOOO excited!!!!

Other than that life is pretty boring!!

COLLEGE??

I am lookig into going to school. I am very excited. I have found this course at Bob Jones University. I will major in Woman's Ministries and Minor in secretarial. It is expensive BUT if God wants me to go then we will provide the money :-)
http://www.bju.edu/academics/sr/undergrad/divps/womens.html

BLAH

OK so life is not great right now...BLAH BLAH BLAH!!! I am just struggling with things...LOTS AND LOTS of things. I want Gods will BUT it is so hard to find it and i don't get it WHY IS IT SOOOO FLIPPIN HARD!!! I can't find a job...college is too expensive!! I don't know what to do!!!
Just please pray with me that i find something soon...being at home is drving me up a wall!!!!


OH BUT ON THE UPSIDE!!! I LOST 22LBS!!! SWEET MOSES I AM GOOD!!!!

Breast Cancer Awareness Month

Facts about Breast Cancer *Every two minutes a woman is diagnosed with breast cancer. *This year more than 211,000 new cases of breast cancer are expected in the United States. *One woman in eight who lives to age 85 will develop breast cancer during her lifetime. *Breast cancer is the leading cause of death in women between the ages of 40 and 55. *1,600 men are expected to be diagnosed with breast cancer this year and 400 are predicted to die. *Seventy percent of all breast cancers are found through breast self-exams. Not all lumps are detectable by touch. *We recommend regular mammograms and monthly breast self-exams. *Eight out of ten breast lumps are not cancerous. If you find a lump, don't panic-call your doctor for an appointment. *Mammography is a low-dose X-ray examination that can detect breast cancer up to two years before it is large enough to be felt. *When breast cancer is found early, the five-year survival rate is 96%. This is good news! Over 2 million breast cancer survivors are alive in America today

BLAH

BEFORE
AFTER

















Well i DO NOT work at the radio station anymore....ITS ok....


So right now i am working for my mom typing out names and chart numbers...it kinda fun...lol

i have embarked on a new lifestyle.....i am losing wieght..lol


I AM CALORIE counting....i am doing the biggest loser style....i bought the cardio and power sculpting videos.....THEY R KILLING ME....it will get easier though and i also walk sometimes....yesterday on the biggest loser site i did this really cool thing and it said something like shrink your belly....see what you will look like at goal weight...i was like well i'll be so i sent in a pic and i will post it on here...I LOVE IT I AM SOOOO HOT...lol


it is TOTAL motivation!!!!!

SHARE-A-THON

Not too much is going on in life....LOL
I work, i eat, i sleep then i get up the next day and do it all again ;-)
Nothin to interesting is going on...LOL not much to report on. I still LOVE my job..BELIEVE me..it has its days!!!! MANY MANY DAYS here lately because of share-a-thon, BUT i still like it!!!!

I probably won't write again til after next week!!!!!

DON'T WORRY BE HAPPY :-)

SUPRISE!!!

the girls

all of us
the bowling alley
the morning after
they were zonked

my niece had a suprise 14th birthday party last week on the 22nd. it was a sleepover. I brought up her friends from the youth group and we went bowling til 1am..it was AWESOME the blacklights and things...very cool.

the next day we slept til 11 or so.......We went shopping at BLOOM the coolest store ever.

For breakfast we had eggs,bacon,sausage gravy,biscuits and cinnamon rolls...all these things ashley wanted.

For dinner we had enchiladas, burritos and nachos...SHE loves mexican..she has chosen this dinner 2 yrs in a row....so all this to say MAN i am feelin a little old...i was 10 when she was born...i am now 24!!! AAAGGGHHH lol j/k i am not feelin too old.....

My Work

Ok this is the front of the building!! I LOVE the red door..LOL

I will get a picture of me at my desk and a pic of the boys SOON...LOL i know i should have had them up by now!!! LOL

I still LOVE my job!!!! Pray for share a thon it is coming up soon. I am in totally uncharted territory and with noone to show me it may get rough. So pray that i pick up and do what need to get dsone QUICKLY and in order!! THANKS!!

oh...SHARE A THON HAPPENS 2X A YEAR it is a week long fundraiser!!! YOU WORK 80 HOUR WEEKS...LOL FUN FUN FUN i am looking forward to it. I used to come and sing here when i was in high school....LOL and now i am getting to do behind the scenes work..LOL

WOW

OK...so like I still totally LOVE my job!!!! Right now i am still learning ALOT of things. I picked up more than i thought i would. Doing it alone for a week first helped i think?? LOL
Right now i am looking for a place and (fingers crossed) i think i found one!!! THANKS BINA!!!!
I will have to take pics of the office so you can see what it looks like!!! Man i need a digital camera!!! LOL
Pray that the apartment thing works out!!! I LOVE BEING A GROWN UP!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHA OOPS!!

I am the office manager :-) I do alot of things. I LOVE IT!!! I stay somewhat busy

NEW JOB!!!!

HEY HEY HEY my peeps!! Life is going GREAT.
Last time i wrote i was looking at moving to St. Louis, WELL I have had a change of events :-)
Ok long story short...LOL
I really really wanted to try Taco Bells new crunchwrap..LOL BUT the line for the drive through was like out on the street...so i was like forget this...i went up to the church sat and talked with pastor and amanda for 10 min and then was going to go on my way. Well i went back down and line was still out the street...BUT something told me to go in...GOD maybe???
So i went in AND there they were...Dr and Mrs. Runion and Angie and the boys. Well EVERYTIME i see them it is ALWAYS an hour conversation..LOL we don't see eachother all that often :-) They went to church with me when i first moved to asheville.
So we were chatting, we talked about HAC and why i left and why i didn't go to Iliinois and he had asked me what i was going to do in illinois and i said i was going to go college. He asked me for what and i told him secretarial and he was like hmm ok..Well angie and i started talking and then he was like well sister when would you like to talk to come talk to me about a job at the radio station and i was like ummm whenever...LOL and he was like how bout today and i was like OK. He said how bout 3pm (PPL IT WAS 2:15PM) and i was like well sir i am not appropriatly dressed and he said well thats fine i know you were on you way to clean houses and such so its ok. SO not having enough time i ran to CVS and got a travel toothbrish and toothpaste and brushed my teeth and stuff at the store and went straight to the radio station. I had a jean skirt on and my broncos t-shirt and flip flops and not make up hair a mess..BUT HERE I GO TO A JOB INTERVIEW....lol
So i went to the station at 3pm...GOT HIRED AT 3:20 AND GOT PUT ON THE CLOCK and worked til 5:30 that day. I also worked the next day from 9-2:30pm:-) That happened because I was going to be the only person in the office for the next week. Brad was going to go to youth conference at Crown college and would be gone all week so he had to train me in those very few hours. I went on vacation wednesday night til monday morning. I came back to work my first full day of work and was alone all day and all week. It was interesting at first and HARD BUT i got into the groove and was ok. It was a rough first couple of days BUT bradley will be back next week so i should be ok. LOL he will show me other things i need to do :-) I AM VERY GLAD OF THAT...........I LOVE MY JOB. IT IS MY DREAM JOB. I have prayed for a REAL JOB forever :-)
The Lord is GOOD

I am also looking into getting an apartment around Christmas or my birthday :-) HOUSE PRESENTS FOR CHRISTMAS AND MY BIRTHDAY.....LOL


WWW.WKJV.COM check it out i will be on there sooner or later when tony the web master gets time to put all my stuff on there :-) SWEET

BIG NEWS!!!

this is Miles and Edison :-) Edison is the baby :-)I have no pics of eliot..LOL

WOW has not been that long since i wrote in here. I told a friend about my blog today and was like..hmmm have not written in that in a week or 2...LOL

I have some good news. I have been working ALOT more than i thought i would wich is an AWESOME PRAISE!!!

I am also still working for the couple in my church. It is fun. Some days it is long like all jobs..LOL

I also have some new news. I ahve NOT really told anyone til i knew for sure what was going on.

I have had an awesome offer to be a nanny for a family i have known for about a year and a half. They will pay me an AWESOME amount of money. I will get a gas stiphen, if i bring my car. I will also live with them. I will be off EVERY sunday and i will work one night a week and 1 saturday a month. They have 3 boys: Eliot is 6, Miles is 4 and Edison was 1 about 2 weeks ago.

i have pics of them on earlier bogs :-)

I LOVE this family very much. I am excited about the oppurtunity. I am not for sure yet if i am going BUT it is lookin like i may go :-)

Pray for Gods guidance and direction!!!

WELL i got to work all week at the daycare. It was a blast!! We had water day wednesday and thursday...the kids LOVE IT!!!
I am also working for a family in my church. I am cooking and cleaning for her. It is alot of fun. She and her kids are allerigc to GLUTEN and ppl let me tell ya did you know gluten is in EVERYTHING....EVERYTHING i feel so bad for them. I am having alot fo fun learning recipes and stuff. IT GREAT!!!

I am trying to find another job...I HATE IT
I am having no luck. I am excited abouts tarting classes in september...i want it to hurry and get here for cryin in the cakes...LOL

WELL....ok so alot of things have happened in a week!!! ALOT ALOT ALOT!!!!

I am NOT taking classes at ABTech til the fall, becasue summer classes have already started, SO i will start in the fall.
I am not really happy about moving HOME but God has been so wonderful and IF i give it time I will be able to move out. LIFE IS GOOD and i am glad that I have been given several work oppurtunities to work since i got back.
I will NOT be working at the daycare this summer BUT i will be subbing when they need me :-)

WELL....summer classes have already started. SO i applied for the fall semester. I am gong to take office systems. IT is a THREE semester degree...PERFECT and there is only ONE english class...LOL and it looks like alot of fun :-)
I am excited..........

OK SO...I AM NOT MOVING
Things happen, you make mistakes and life stinks.
I lost something special and it stinks BUT i guess life goes on.

I am going to take classes at AB Tech this summer and work toward a degree :-)

Kimmels...

This is my edison...i don't have pics of the other boys...they wont let me take pics of them...LOL

OK SO UMMMM i was babysitting Eliot, Miles and Edison for the last time saturday night.

I had alot of fun. I will miss them like crazy Eliot was sitting playing box and kept talking about the world ending or something and i was like why r u crying....and he said the world is ending a dn i was like WHAT!! and i asked him Y is the world ending and he said it was because I was leaving and he was going to miss me playing with them. I started crying something FIERCE....it was so sweet BUT so sad at the same time :-( I WILL MISS MY BOYS

Harder than I thought

OK so THIS moving thing is harder than i thought. I CAN NOT stop crying...I cry on and off all the time...BLAH
I just want to hurry and get it over with sometimes so my emotions can go back to MILDLY normal....LOL

ROAD TRIP

IN A WEIRD MOOD!!! LOL

OK SO THE COUNTDOWN BEGINS!!! I am moving May 25th!!!! 13 DAYS!!! Jami has her ticket and i am packing BLAH.....I HATE PACKING!!!! It will soon be over then i can unpack AND then pack again when we move into a bigger apartment...LOL

ITS ALL GOOD.

I can't wait for the mini road trip it should be exciting!!!

BLAH BLAH BLAH!! Packing is going OK....I HATE IT....LOL but it will all be over soon :-)

I have about 2 weeks til i move now. Jami is coming to asheville so the two of us can drive to illinois together. I am excited.....ROAD TRIP!!! LOL

I am going to my grandmas memorial serivce on Saturday the 24th. I will travel back with my sister and then go get Jami from the Airport and we will leave Sunday afternoon or Monday morning. We don't know it is still up in the air.

I will miss my kids!!!

These are some of my kids from work. I will miss them all so so so much!!!

Some of them i met when they were babies and they are all grown up now!!! I will miss them so much and i hope my new job has kids just as good!!!

I WILL MISS THEM SO SO SO MUCH :-(

I'M MOVING

This is THE ONLY pic i have of just Jami and I....LOL

I AM MOVING TO South Elgin, IL to live with my BFF Jami Tutor!!! I am so excited. I am Lord Willing going to get a job in a daycare. I am very excited about this new adventure I am aboutt o take, I am scared BUT it will be ok.

I am going to be going to Kane County Baptist Church. Jamis friends husband is the pastor there. It is a smaller church that i go to now BUT it will be nice.

In January I am planning on going to Providence Baptist college and taking the two year secretarial degree. I am excited about finishing. I should have 12 credits that will transfer over from HAC!!!!

SO these are the plans :-)

I would appreciate the prayers :-) THANKS

MY GRAN GRAN

January was a sad month for our family......My grandma went in the hospital at 5am December 29th and was in the hospital for 6 days....She went home to be with the Lord on January 4th, 2008

She has lived with me since i was about 6 or 7 years old.........

Margaret W. Lupgens
Asheville - Margaret Lupgens, 77, of Asheville, passed away Friday, Jan. 4, 2008, at Mission Hospitals.
She is preceded in death by her parents, Howard and Lizzie Vealey,
and two brothers.
Loving wife of Gerard A. Lupgens for 48 years.
Mother to Orville Ed Henderson (Barbara) of Asheville; Deborah Dinger (Daniel) and Nancy Lupgens of Cleveland, Ohio; and Doris Lupgens of Rapid City, S.D.
Sister to James Vealey (deceased) of Elkhart, Ind.; Howard Vealey (deceased) of Beckley, W. Va.; Edna Matheney (Jack) of Dallas, Ga.; Jane Ellen Lowe (Woody) of Elkhart, Ind.; Joe Vealey (Linda) of Elyria, Ohio; and Beverly Goldberg of Elkhart, Ind.
Grandmother to Nicholas, Samantha, Jacqueline, Martin,
Nikki,
Darrin, Michael, Gary, Jeffrey, Ben, and
Kenneth.
Great-grandmother to Keane, Brittany,
Austin, Ashley, Gabrielle, Kaitlyn, Martin Jr., Christina, Allison, Ryan, Chad, Chayce, Chloe, Destiny, Montana, and Seth; as well as many nieces and nephews.
Per Margaret ' s wishes, a memorial will be held in Collinsdale, W.Va., at a later date.

DADDY PULLING PORK AKA BOSTON BUTT ;-)


















THIS IS MY AUNT DORIS, ANUT JANE ELLEN, UNCLE JOE AND YOU CAN SEE HALF AUNT LINDAS FACE ;-)




















GRAMPS,COUSIN DARRIN AND CUZ...LOL i think his name was Ray but we called him cuz because he is darrens wifes cousin...LOL


















UNCLE JOE AND KAITLYN...SHE LOVED HIM and by the time they left she had him eating out of her hands..........LOL


















this is OUR cool cousin Ben....



















this is my sista workin her butt off for all these 30 ppl in our home

ME OPENING THE BEST PRESENT EVER................My Samantha American Girl Doll that i have wanted since i was 7 yrs old :-)
We had a very good christmas :-)